Fast Times at Redneck High....
Well since nothing is really happening in sports right now, let me take this moment to present to all of you....
Fun With Google: The Redneck addition
First off, this was a very special day for me and Davey. It was our prom and we took these lovely ladies. I'm the dashing fellow on the left in the snazzy white suit that my Grandfather was buried in....don't ask me how I got....let's just say alcohol was involved. Davey's date couldn't find a dress, and she was debating on going nude, but her Pa thought that would be in bad taste, so he took down his confederate flag and made her that sexy little number.
As some of you may know, it's hard out here for hick. So obviously Davey and myself couldn't afford the "traditional" hot tub. So we came up with this brilliant idea. We filled up one of the many bath tubs in his front yard with water and we put it over the fire at our hoot-in-nanny.
Here I am on a hot date. It's hard to complain when this is the alternative.
Now when some of you go out to check out women, you go to a night club....not Davey, he goes to the local women's prison to look for chicks just getting released. His moto is " hey, they just got out of prison, they'll do anyone."
Card games have recently became very popular. So I had the great idea to come up with my own card game. The picture is curtisy of Bill, sadly he's no longer with us. He got into a riding lawnmower accident, we tried to tell him 350 horsepower was enough, but hicks will be hicks.
These are Davey's dogs. Blue, Ed and Napoleon. Davey really cares about his dogs, so he decided to put them on the same dental plan as him.
Have you ever wondered what a cup holder looks like in the south. Well just place your beer in between the nearst pair of breast you can find and there ya go.
Davey isn't a big fan of Santa, and he lets him know exactly how he feels.
I was really worried about North Korea testing nukes, so I decided to build my own storm shelter.
What's more important to a redneck than a 12 pack of bud and a nascar race on the tv? Well nothing but his wedding day is a close 2nd.
This is Davey's wedding day, oh come on Davey, don't be camera shy.
Now some brides throw their bouquets, not my blushing bride. She keeps it straight trailer park, lift her up, tap the keg and lets party.
Since down here in the south, were not really known for our smarts, so we had to have the two people who graduated 4th grade to teach our curious youth sex ed.
I was a little mad at Davey for awhile, because he stopped listening to our native country music for an 80's album that just came in a couple of days ago. Well he immediatley took family portraits with his new dew.
Last but certainly not least, here is Davey's drunk 2nd cousin twice removed modeling some redneck maternity wear.
Well that's all for now, I hope you enjoyed.
1 comment:
Lol! omg that so funny, your awesome dude.
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